Yikes!

Okay, so now I am officially starting the "freak out" with regards to what is expected of me from my class. Last night we went over what our final portfolio is supposed to look like and I realized that I’m in big trouble. We’re supposed to basically turn in a complete revision of one of the fiction pieces we’ve done and revision of two poems. As we were going over that, I realized (and pointed out) that because of the way this class has been set up, that means that we have two stories to choose from and no choice but to revise both the poems we wrote. The problem is that the poem I turned in last night, I don’t WANT to make any major revisions on it. I’m sure I’ll make some minor changes in wording and such, but for the most part, I’m happy with it as it is. So half my poetry grade is out the window. And of the two stories I turned in, I don’t care for either enough to do a substantial revision on them. They were pieces of attempted fiction that I don’t feel the desire to finish. Which tosses out my fiction grade. He did allow for us to write one new work for our workshops (which is what the entire class will be reading and critiquing) and I’d really like to make another attempt at the fiction, but nothing I can think of feels right. I'm hoping that I can come up with something a little more light-hearted than my first couple of papers, but I'm struggling. I have a couple stories in my head, a couple of amusing anecdotes that would be fun to write about, but nothing that would fulfill the requirements of the four page (1000 word) story that includes characters, tension, conflict, and resolution. Even if I found a way to string several of them together to form a complete story, I find that any theme I try to work with feels forced and fake.

And then the panic starts to set in. What was I thinking taking this class????